the seasonal blogs from 2006 to 2009

---------spring ----------------summer--------------autumn-----------winter -------

2006 2007 20082006 2007 2008 20092006 2007 20082006 2007 2008
from Sep'2009 permanent website @ The Four Seasons of Haiku
back from holidays -
petals of cherry tree
in the broom

***

retour de vacances -
des pétales de cerisier
dans les poils du balai

4 comments:

Area 17 said...

Dear Damien,

I love this!

Did you mean to say something like this for the English-language version:

back from holidays -
petals of the cherry tree
in the broom's bristles
or maybe...

back from holidays -
petals of the cherry tree
in the broom
Wonderful haiku, very fresh, as always.

Damien Gabriels said...

Thank you Linda and Alan

Alan, you're completely right : a big mistake in my translation. I keep your second version that appears to be lighter

Area 17 said...

Dear Damien,

You've tightened up my translation, and it's better. ;-)

It's a lovely sense haiku, beyond merely visual.

all my best,

Alan

diana l. said...

Yes, I like this too.